I feel like I need to start this post off with an apology. I took an unintentional hiatus from posting and not only was it not good for me but it has left a lot of you in the dark. Our infertility journey has not ended and I am truly sorry to all of you that I haven’t updated in quite a while.
I have been having a hard time putting a lot of what’s been going on into words. Have you ever had a time in your life where you feel something is too good to be true? Almost like you are so sure that something bad is going to happen and feel like it could pop its ugly head out at any moment? I am now 17 weeks pregnant and that is mostly how I felt up until about week 15. 😕
I thought once we were finally pregnant,
all my fears from everything that has happened the past 3 years would just fade away and I would be in a constant state of happiness. Now don’t get me wrong, I am overly excited and happy to be pregnant. I know how lucky I am to be in this position and I don’t take that for granted. But it has taken me a long time to convince myself that I could relax and actually enjoy this moment in my life.
Before week 12 I was being monitored by my doctor about every 2 weeks. That is typical for an IVF patient because there is just SO much that can go wrong during those weeks and when you have the highest chance of miscarrying. I actually had a small scare around week 8 and of course I called them freaking out so they had me come in for an extra appointment just to check and make sure baby was okay. Thank God he was but that put me even more on edge during the weeks that followed. Each appointment consisted of me being overly nervous and anxious until we heard that little heartbeat going and our doctor say “baby looks great”… Then I felt like I could breathe again for a while. 🙂
Our week 12 appointment was a bittersweet one. It was the last one we would have with our incredible infertility doctor. He told us he was really sad to see us go but so happy that we had finally graduated to a normal pregnancy doctor. It meant he had been successful and was able to move us forward in our journey. We told him we would miss him but we would see him again in the future!
I was extremely nervous for my first appointment with the new doctor. She was recommended by Dr. K so I knew she had to be amazing but in my mind, no one could compare to the incredible treatment and understanding that we had experienced with Dr. K. Cliff was away at work so Cody and I had to go without him. I mean, its not like I was going to meet a new doctor without introducing her to Cody! Cody is an important member of the family!
Anyways, as it turns out, she is also pretty amazing. Her personality and overall attitude is just like mine and we clicked immediately so I felt much more at ease about the rest of the pregnancy after that appointment. The only downfall was that now I had to get use to going from being seen every 2 weeks to waiting an entire month before seeing baby again! It doesn’t seem like that much longer but for me it felt like an eternity before my second appointment!
In between those 2 appointments we did a genetic screening which included gender as well. If you don’t follow me on social media then I am happy to announce the genetic part came back completely fine (YAY!) and we are having a baby BOY!!!!!! 💙 Initially I just planned to go to dinner with our parents and open the envelope that told us boy or girl. I never thought we would do an actual gender reveal but my awesome sister-in-law had other plans for us. She came up with the coolest way for us to find out and then slowly as our friends started hearing that we were going to do a “mini” reveal thing at Cliffs parents house, they all showed up to be with us! Some of our people who are in different states/cities even demanded to be included by facetime! I felt so loved by everyone and was so happy with how it all came together. There were multiple times over the past 3 years where I really wasn’t sure a gender reveal of any kind was going to ever happen for us. So I am just so happy and thankful for how it all turned out. 🥰
My Christmas/New Years resolution is to make sure I post more about all the things that are happening! It made me sad to think I had not updated anyone in a while. I realized that even though this is a great outlet for me, it makes my heart happy to know there are other people out there who are also rooting for us to win this battle. And if we can dominate this infertility thing, maybe it will give hope to others too.
I leave you this time with a short video of our gender reveal. Listen to Cliffs comment at the end.. its priceless ♥
Hooray for comments!